The Most Interesting Person in the World


Posted on: May 21, 2010

My glasses  are broken, so I need to fathom a new way of interacting wih my laptop. I have volunteered a lot with people who are blind and vision-impaired, so I know my computer is capable of a zoom feature that would make the screen readable. My first option is command-plus sign, which biggifies the page I’m on, but needs to be pushed enough times that now my textbox barely fits into the window, and is overcrowded by the sidebar. I searched the “Find Out How” website to find out that yes, in fact, there is zoomability on my computer. What did you expect, us to tell you HOW to do it? That’s just crazy talk!

Okay, so I searched the computer itself. There is a zoom feature. I put in all my preferences, and click accept. I am waiting for it to accept. It turns out in order to activate the zoom, I must push a series of keys, one of which looks like a slash but has lines at the top and bottom, and another line randomly that makes it look like a character in a foreign languate. But, darnit, that thing is not on my keyboard. I tried pushing the rest of the series of keys with the slash button. That does nothing. I want to highlight that key, push control-c and then control-p and the rest of the series… except I have a sneaking suspicion that that would do nothing.

My best bet is to stay off the computer until I get new glasses. Since I can’t watch tv either, maybe I should go outside. Not that I can drive anywhere. Maybe I’ll just play ball with myself.  As long as I don’t throw the ball very far, cause then I would never see it.

Uselessness: 1. Accessibility of this “accessbility” feature: 0.
Update: I have come up with a new solution. Since one of my lenses is still in the frame, all I need is an eyepatch, and at least I can see clearly out of one eye.
Visibility: 1/2. Depth perception: 0.

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